Cloudy Monday Mystery

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Hi all! Happy Monday!

Sorry I forgot to post last Friday. I was like “I’m going to post something. I’m going to post something. I’m going to post something.” and then I fell asleep and completely forgot to post something. For shame. Anyway, not much happened over last week. The highlight being 420, not much else happened. I did a small photoshoot of the watches I bought last month. You can check out of the photos here. I don’t know! I just don’t know what else to say. The weather has been dreary these past couple of days so I haven’t been able to get out and take photos. I’d like to go to the seawall in Stanley park and take photos there but there’s no one to go with.

So just thinking back on some things. It’s been almost two years since I was first hospitalized and I’ve come a long way. My mood has stabilized and although I may not necessarily be happier I am a lot more positive about the future than I was before. I currently don’t have a job and I’m not really actively looking for one but I don’t feel worried or pressured. There’s no anxiety over the issue which I’m pleased. It’s confusing. Sometimes I’m worried sometimes I’m not but mostly I’m not. The frustrating part is I feel stuck. It’s not the whole job thing or education thing or it might be but I just feel stuck. I can’t pinpoint what it is. Sorry, I know I’m sorta contradicting myself here. I just feel so lost about all that’s happened and is happening. Blah I don’t know. When I see my psychiatrist we don’t talk much. I never know what to say and so things have been progressing really slowly. I mostly rely on my meds to get me through the day. And they work effectively. I have no qualms with my medications in fact I love them. I’ve grown so attached to them. They calm me, they give me energy boosts, they help me get sleep when my troubled mind starts to act up, they quiet my days and bring a sense of stillness. Hmm… I smell the burning of pine wood. I love that smell. Reminds me of my Scouting days and campfires at night. I feel a lack of motivation. I want to pick up the guitar and play but at the same time I don’t feel like it. Ugh. Pathetic. I don’t know any more. Maybe I am going insane.

Today’s photo is another Lamborghini. So many Lamborghinis! I wish I had one hahahaha naw not really. I promise the next picture won’t be a Lamborghini. It’ll be like Ferrari or something. I also promise I won’t fall asleep this Friday. I’ll be making another Free Association Friday post this Friday. Oh! One more thing! Recently one of my photos got featured on http://chinadigitaltimes.net/ . It was featured in their picture of the day. Yay! =D

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