Scrambling Eggs


Hi all! Happy Monday!

The weekend was a bit of a blur. I slept almost all of Saturday having no energy to do anything. I spent Sunday out at the hardware stores shopping for things just to get some juices flowing to the head and all that. Also went to the car dealership to check out some cars. After that we had a family dinner at a restaurant I worked on. As a habit I usually avoid places I’ve worked on because I know the “behind the scenes” and most places are filthy. But seeing as how it was my grandmother’s birthday, it couldn’t be avoided. The food was meh at best. It was overpriced and wasn’t great food. We probably won’t be going there again, thank god.

There are other things going on in my life besides sleeping all day. There’s the headache of trying to register for classes and courses and being unable to because I’m too slow. All the courses I want or need are taken up. I can’t even get waitlisted because the waitlists are full as well. I feel like such a failure. Here comes the spiraling again into despair; the catastrophization of events in my head. I’ve learnt about this groups and how to avoid it and deal with it. But most times it’s simply too much. It’s one thing to sit in a group and do breathing exercises and list out the pros and cons under the direction of a therapist for a made up scenario. But it’s another thing doing it in real life. I guess you just have to force yourself to sit down and do it. I tend to do a rough draft in my head and be content with it. But it does a poor job alleviating the pertaining issues and then I end up doing what a also do which is to avoid the issue by going to nap.

There are a lot of interesting techniques out there for me to learn about so I guess I should keep attending these groups instead of skipping them because I’m “tired” or “not in the mood”. Maybe there’s one out there that’s very simple and takes very little effort to master. But for now I feel like I’m scrambling to get things done. And there’s no order to it at all. I feel like I’m flailing around in the kiddy pool and looking like a complete moron.

Anyway, I hope you all have a great week! Your comments and thoughts are always welcomed below!


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